NEW MAGAZINE TO BE INTRODUCED

The BayCloner Magazine, launched as a parody of Clear Lake's venerable Bayrunner over 2 years ago, is at it again. They plan to publish a new monthly tentatively named "The Nightmusic News", hoping to cash in on the lucrative business being done by Nightmoves and the area's original music magazine, The Music News. Spies at Baycloner parent company BAMMS (Boring Area Monthly Magazine Specialists) told Gatorpress that the format will be similar to the failed "Baysportin'" magazine, with articles about anyone willing to trade a cheeseburger for an ad. BAMMS management has greedily eyed the success of the two popular magazines, and long desired a foothold in entertainment publishing.
"They really really want to be cool" the source said, "some of the office guys are letting their hair grow over their collars, and they hired a guy with a pierced ear. The bosses are all saying things like 'far out, man' and 'that's really hip'. It's like the fuckin' Mod Squad around here."
Articles tentatively slated for the debut issue will include: "Liposuction Is A Totally Rad Way Of Body Piercing", "Buying Insurance From This Dude Here Is Awesome", and "Restaurant Owner Would Really Dig It If You Showed Up".
Former BayCloner writer Kay O'Peck-Tate  told Gator Press: "The BayCloner's corporate mission is to grab the money, whereas the philosophy of today's young people is to renounce corporate greed. So the message the staff gets is all mixed up, kind of like 'Peace, my groovy brother, and make the check payable to…'"
The Editor of the new publication will reportedly be Shirley Zayanki, formerly in charge of morale and employee beatings with the Greedsheet.

Target date for the first issue is Dec. 1st, when copies will be distributed at local nightclubs and assisted-living facilities. The new magazine will be named "The Scene" in order to avoid lawsuits.